Well, it wasn't as bad as all of that. Zoe maintains that the United people were actually pretty friendly (they were). The girls responded well to getting woken up at 3am and shuffled around the airport. There were no tears at any point. We also got to use the new portable DVD player to watch movies in the airport (thanks mom!), so that was great. Also, American people in general are very friendly and chatty, which I had sort of forgotten, so strangers helped us with our things and were quite nice. I still feel tired but that's hardly surprising, and the girls are sleeping great. Huzzah!