Original B-Dub

The greatest interview in the history of the internet has been posted. You probably think I'm just saying that because it's an interview with my brother, but you're wrong. Wrong! Who defines swass for you, baby?

Jedmunds: Well, my esteemed friend, you’ve been on the forefront to my mind of popularizing the term “swass,” in everday types of usage. Perhaps you could define it for us.

Ben Styles: I've heard swass defined as two things: 1. Some Wacked Ass Stupid Shit. I don't buy it. No one says that anyway. When was the last time you heard someone say something was some wacked ass stupid shit? 2. Sir Mix-a-Lot, on his album "Swass," uses the term in context. A famous line is "don't you wish your boyfriend was swass like me?" Which seems to suggest that he thinks any chick's boyfriend must be lamer than him, or at least not as swass. So I take it to mean super-cool, smooth, suave, and the like.

Allow me to just interject here, Ben is totally right. Is there really a controversy here? Next people will be arguing about what "bama" means; please. Also, with the insightful film criticism:

Jedmunds: Well, now that it is officially somewhere on the internet, it must be true. So, tell me, if you drew a mustache on George W. Bush, would he remind you more of Charlie Chaplin or Buster Keaton?

Ben Styles: Jees. Depends on the moustache -- if it was a Chaplin, he'd probably look more like Hitler. So I'll go with General Custer.

Jedmunds: Jesus Christ.  What the hell is your problem with silent movies anyway?

Ben Styles: (glares at me quietly)

Jedmunds: (uncomfortable chuckling) I mean, well, umm. What don’t you like about them?

Ben Styles: They are all quiet and stuff. And the plots are gay, all running around and over-emoting. Yeah, so they set the benchmark for movies. But so did celery soda for soft-drinks, and nobody drinks celery soda.

Did I ever mention that my brother Ben is always right about everything? Except, you know, I do like a Dr. Brown's Cel-Ray every once in a while. Still, Read the Whole Thing, fools, or you will be missing out like MAD.

Comments

[fafnir]

Dude, Dr. Brown's Cel-ray is awesome. It's "totally herpes," which is a favorable expression we are attempting to popularize in the Fafhold (which means the Fafnir Household) (which is another expression we are also trying to popularize) (in the Fafhold).

[MQ]

As hip as your brother might be, he's apparently not as cool as a black person. Like white boys everywhere he is reduced to puzzling out cryptic lyrics on rap albums to obtain the secrets of cool.

[Benjamin]

Hah -- I was just adding some context and trying to be "smart." I know what swass means from the very strands of my DNA.

"China is here, Mr. Burton."

[Mandos]

Celery soda? There exists such an abomination?

[Carlos]

And it's kosher.

[Ray Davis]

Buster Keaton affected no moustache, nor was he over-emoting. As far as I know neither he or Chaplin lay gay plots, and I don't know how your brother knows different. Also, MAD the comic did not miss out, although Mad the magazine did. If this is the greatest interview ever, you didn't get me to look at it, and if it isn't, you lied to me. You have a lot to answer for, Belle.

[Ray Davis]

Dang it, I should've said "This will not stand."

[Jedmunds]

Greatest interview in the history of the internet?

Surely that's some kind of understatement, unless of course, you are familiar with the classic series of interviews conducted by Jim "JR" Ross with Mick "Mankind" Foley for WWF wrestling back in the mid 90's. The superiority of which I will not question.

[pf]

nor was he over-emoting

Neglect not the early films with Fatty Arbuckle, co-starring a well emoting Buster, who at times even over-emotes (I remember vividly one scene where his neck is trapped under a barbell and he twitches and silent screams with the best of them, id est his co-star, and his eyebrows are as plucked as that man's, that deeply frightening and well-foundationed man).

[Lauren]

"Swass" is, in my experience, short for "sweaty ass."

Also, I am currently trying to bring back common usage of "wack" and "fly."

[ben wolfson]

Celery is totally underrated and I would guzzle celery soda by the gallon if it were made available to me. And Silent Movie is great.

[Yan]

This is so bizarre. I had never in my life encountered an educated, intelligent person expressing contempt for early film. And in this blog I've encountered it at least twice. It's so first-year. Dude, Plato doesn't know shit! He was born, like, a hundred years ago!

[g]

you are all full o shit, as much as those wekipedia flichmongers, Mix A Lot defines the term SWASS, in the albums liner notes. "A little research"